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NuesPournous Review

~ Pros ~

Tons of porn categories

Supports video preview

~ Cons ~ 

❌ Distracting ads when streaming videos

❌ Videos are hosted offsite

❌ No option to switch languages

❌ Very plain site design

❌ Slow video loading times

❌ No video download option


    Describing an entire country as being very open about sex might be a very mild description of the French. PornGuy has the utmost respect for a country and its people who feel regular no-shame screwing is acceptable.

    In a country with such a high standard for passionate screwing, they must top the chart with high-quality porn content on any respectable French-based site, right? Well, this and more will be answered by PornGuy in this review of NuesPournous.com.

All Round French Fucking Fiesta

    Europe has a very large pool of plump, passionate, cuckold-hungry broads to select from, and they all share the same hunger for the wonder stick gifted men like PornGuy lug around all day. The sensual movement of their well-rounded bodies to the steady thrust of a good dick makes whatever is bothering you at the moment just fade away.

    With this mentality and my previous experience fucking the brains out of French girls, I entered this site only to witness the unholy plainness of a drab gray background. At first, I assumed I misspelled the site, but nope, it was correct. We are talking about the French, who are the cum cream and cultured people in Europe. Surely, they would always put out a dope display of flair that would dazzle your limp cock into a stiff boner instantly. But to my sore disappointment, NuesPournous is a very plain-looking site with barely any thought to design.

    The top of the site has NuesPournous.com, obviously designed by a small-dick person as the logo is very mid-sized, and next to the logo is a medium-sized looking search bar too. Next to this is the Categories tab, which displays a very impressive list of porn categories. This list is so vast that some categories I rarely see are here. Take the granny lesbians or the rectal exam categories. Those are very rare categories that even a porn guru like PornGuy was very impressed by. The categories tab is, without doubt, the best and the closest thing to Frenchness on NuesPournous. To complete this small dick design, there is a Best and Latest tab that shows you the best videos on the side or the most recently updated videos.

NuesPournous? More Like, Oh no, no porn for you!

    This is no joke, but the legend himself, PornGuy, couldn’t watch porn on a “porn site”. Firstly, the homepage is so disorganized with random porn categories next to each other and just a single medium-sized thumbnail with one image in it. Okay, as if that was not already ball-crushing enough, selecting a category like “Amateurs" will show a large set of hardon-inspiring porn videos of ruby-eyed amateurs having a go at each other's cunts. The videos can even be previewed, that's pretty cool, but that's where the fun ends.

    I have had better luck ramming my cock through a tight ass than playing a single video on this cum forsaken site called NuesPournous. Most of the videos are redirected to other sites, and even on those sites, you still can't play the fucking video!

What the PornGuy Thinks of NuesPournous

    From the medium-sized look of everything on this site, it is a fair guess to say the site designer is a tiny-sized dick dude or a nun. Because I cannot decide whether this is a real porn site or a prank, because no sane porn fan would design such a thing. Why set up a site and make it as hard as a rectal exam to watch a single video? Such a waste of space, time, and a very valuable boner.

NuesPournous, NuesPournous

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