I don’t think I have ever been to Babylon. Unless of course I got kidnapped and taken there while I was asleep and woke up none the wiser. Anyway, Babylonian women were supposed to be pretty fine, so I wouldn’t mind being king or a prince in a place like that and being able to explore as many fine pussies and assholes as I can find a use for!
However, we are not gathered here today for a discourse on Babylon, its women, their pussies, and assholes. What brings us here is a review of an escort site with the unusual name of Escort Babylon. Better pour yourself a fresh glass of beer and check out my Escort Babylon review
What Happens In Babylon…
Basically, Escort Babylon is an escort review site. It comes in handy if you want to hire an escort or two and need to know that they are as good as they say they are and won’t rob you blind once you fuck them silly and pass out.
Escorts are usually sleek and ultra-fine creatures who take great care of their body and smell really nice. That can’t really be said for the Escort Babylon site, which looks like a couple of 10-year olds with two left hands drank colored juice, had themselves a right royal shit, and used this to build the site!
Look, the site design is as dated as sin, but I don’t think that’s enough reason to kick Escort Babylon into the bin yet. When you make it to the site, you will be faced with a mostly blank page, with a search bar attached to the top of it. A little way below are options to check out escort reviews by their date, popularity, or how current they are. A red button lets you check out escorts and escort reviews in a particular city and this often comes in handy.
Once you click on the aforementioned red button, you will be asked to choose your location and this can be Oceania, Europe, Canada, and the U.S. Clicking the first of these options lets you choose from between Australia and New Zealand. Likewise, clicking on Europe will bring forth some European countries you can select from, while tapping Canada or the US will bring forth a list of states in these countries.
I selected the U.S. option, clicked on Arizona and then Phoenix, cos I have heard that girls in Phoenix have cunts that are lined with fur and flowing with champagne! Spend a night with these babes and your cock will be treated like a king on his birthday!
Once I had selected Phoenix as my city of choice, my screen got filled with image thumbnails of escorts and their reviews and these were constantly refreshing so that getting to the bottom of it was not an easy thing. Near the top of the page are options to select another city, or sort the search results by date, popularity, and how current they are. It just so happens that you can click on each escort image thumbnail and be able to see content on her, such as pictures, information as to where she is, her old posts, comments made on her profile, and reviews.
However, you cannot read an escort review on Escort Babylon unless you first submit a review of your own. That doesn’t make much sense to me, but I guess it’s just a way of showing you that nothing is free and you got to give something to get something. You cannot randomly submit a review though. First, you have to register and choose a password and registration is a free affair.
If you don’t want to post an escort review, that’s cool. Why is it cool? Well, as I said before, escort profiles here have content like pictures and most of these are X-rated. That means you can see some pretty chicks nude or half nude and waste a couple of hours fantasizing about sticking it in them till their booty hole can’t take it anymore and have to blow itself up or something!
Anyway, I do love to be thorough. So I registered and did a few reviews of a few chicks I had never met or banged, just so that I could read reviews by other site users. The review format is easy, as you merely need to click boxes and input details like the name of the chick you are reviewing, the date you two got together for some nasty business, and whether it was worth it or not. Then you get to rate her attractiveness, hygiene, personality, performance, and punctuality.
Next, you are supposed to sum up your experience, describe what the escort looked like and her attitude and then give a two sentence summary of everything. In total, there are 4 pages of a review that you have to fill out. I filled out mine with phony shit. Don’t you fuckers rat me our or my account there will be banned.
What I Think
I enjoyed my time on Escort Babylon. It had a lot of chicks eager to show you what they look like in the nude, and up for fucking you out of your mind if you are in their state and got the money they are asking for. However, to be honest, the site design is perhaps the most horrible I have seen in a couple of years. That and the fact that you can’t sit down and read the escort reviews that the site was set up for without first registering and writing at least one review means that I am not all that much of a big fan.
Overall, I would recommend Escort Babylon. But I don’t really like it.
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